Dating, On a Diet

Let me start my saying that I believe this story to be true, as it was told to me directly by the person to whom it happened. However, the more it gets re-told- and believe me, it does- the more it develops into the stuff of NYC Urban Dating Legend.

Boy meets a nice-seeming girl on a very popular dating website. They hit it off and arranged a first date, settling on a Mediterranean style restaurant. Like many NYC venues, it was cozy, with the tables set close together. As the waiter comes over, the young lady immediately asks for extra plates and a new set of silverware, which she thoroughly wipes upon their arrival. They proceed to order an array of food to share, including various salads, pita bread, rice and the like.

When the meal arrives, the girl pulls out of her previously ordinary-looking, mild-mannered handbag, a... wait for it.... Weight Watchers scale and a set of measuring spoons. Yes. Really. She then begins to scoop out portions of the different foods, and carefully weighs them on the scale, before depositing them onto the extra plates. This continues for several minutes, while the guy just observes, quite stunned at the spectacle before him, because his female companion has offered no explanation or commentary to accompany her actions. Not only is the guy watching, but at the table next to them, two men on a date are equally mesmerized by the weigh-in session taking place. Once she finishes her measuring, the young woman excuses herself briefly to the ladies' room. Our gentleman friend is flabbergasted to say the least. Is this how women act on a date these days, he wonders to himself. Then, unexpectedly, one of the men to his side leans over and asks, "Where'd you find this one?" The guy replies, naming the dating site. "Ahh," the men respond, knowingly. "Have you considered coming over to our side?"

As you may have guessed, this was their first, and only, date.

What is the moral of this story you ask? First of all, Don't Do This!! Ok, phew, that's over with. Now let's get down to business. There are plenty of ways to maintain a healthy and fit lifestyle while dating happily. If Superman could disguise himself as Clark Kent with the simple assistance of a pair of Foster Grants, you can date and diet simultaneously.

Maybe you can squeeze in a work out before the date, or first thing the next morning. Or try eating a lighter lunch, if you know you hope to share a dessert with your new sweetie that night.

When you're on the date itself, some good healthy food options include:

Sushi (try Momoya for fresh food & outstanding service, or Natsumi where you can enjoy a pre-dinner cocktail in their romantic lounge area)

Vegetarian/Vegan (delicious Wild Ginger has 2 inviting locations, while adventurous diners might enjoy the upscale, raw Pure Food and Wine)

Tapas (share sangria and small, yet satisfying dishes at Sol y Sombra, or revel in the glittery chandeliers overhead while you dine at Pipa)

Now, let's step back and look at the bigger lesson here. When you go on a date with someone, especially a first date, you don't have to reveal everything there is to know about you right up front. Hold back on some details about yourself, and save those crazy stories that your close friends love about you for a bit later. Why not let a little mystery and intrigue pervade the air?

Some examples?

• You have an older brother who lives in Washington, D.C.? Great! He's married to a controlling harpy who ruined your parents' anniversary party last spring by boozily toasting your father and his mistress? Not so good.

• You're in charge of a big project at work that you're really proud of? Lovely. When you finish the project you're going to rub it in the face of those good-for-nothing colleagues who couldn't even be bothered to ask if you wanted to join them for lunch and... Maybe not.

It's not only important to be upbeat on dates, but it's perfectly acceptable, and in fact better, to be a little discreet at the beginning of a relationship. That's not to say that you shouldn't be yourself and share things with your date. But there's plenty of time to let the getting to know one another part of the relationship unfold. That's the fun of it, discovering what makes your mate tick. And it works both ways. You'll want to learn more about your date, and he or she will be intrigued by all the things you haven't said yet.

So try it out for yourself. Give your dating style its own diet, and hold off on some details about yourself, for a few more dates anyway. Maybe then, you can pull out your own Weight Watchers scale.

Cocktails & Daydreams - Part 1

Much has been said about what the type of drink a man or woman imbibes says about their personality. Beer guzzling gals come across as "the guy's girl" and willing to kick back. Men who prefer their whiskey neat may have a leg up on their apple martini drinking competition. Heck, a recent social study breaks down personality types based on how you hold your drink.

I have a different theory when it comes to choosing your beverage while on a date. Sure, some daters may rate you based on your preferences, but in my opinion what really counts is where you take your date, and the amount of effort you put into planning that evening out.

You want your companion to be thinking about your great date well into the next day, and sharing his or her excitement with others. By giving them a date to remember, you will not only create a good time, but also ensure that he or she is eagerly awaiting the next time you see one another.

It's important to choose a location that has the right ambiance for the type of evening you're aiming for. Here are some suggestions to help you create the perfect date mood, that leaves a lasting impression.

Snazzy, sophisticated cocktail lounge
In the first part of this series, we'll take a look at some sultry bars made especially for a special occasion date, for when you really want to knock someone's socks off:

Brandy Library- 25 N. Moore, b/w Varick & Hudson
This place is the epitome of swanky. The lights are dim. The walls are lined with volumes of high end cognacs and whiskeys. The bartenders and servers take great pride in helping you select the perfect drink. This lounge is a conversation starter and will make your date rave to his or her friends afterward. (They also offer tasting classes, and complimentary samplings on Sat late afternoons.)

Campbell Apartment- 15 Vanderbilt Ave, attached to Grand Central Terminal

Prepare to sweep your date off of their feet when you whisk them away to this classic old New York venue. Once the former office of John Campbell in the 1920s, it has since been converted into your perfect cozy and glamorous date spot. You will not be disappointed by the decadent cocktail choices and the deep toned decor of this hidden locale. Note that you have to enter through the outside of GCT... after navigating the 2nd floor of the train station for 15 min, I learned that one the hard way.

Also worth mentioning:
The Dove Parlour- Romantic, Victorian feel, this Village lounge's Silk Road Margarita with cinnamon-infused tequila is to die for.
PDT- You have to enter this quasi-speakeasy through a phone booth from the adjacent hot dog shop.

A final note. Here's one more worthy contender, and a particular favorite of mine: Shalel Lounge. This underground UWS bar is cavernous, dark* & romantic. In fact, it's practically known as a make out den, full of nooks and crannies meant for couples. This was confirmed by the Shalel bartender I spoke to earlier tonight, who cheekily told me that part of his job is to regulate "hijinks" among the bar patrons. Sweet. Could serve as a nice place to grab a nightcap at the end (or just the beginning??) of a great date.

*I mean really dark. The pictures above received the benefit of a a serious flash. This place is all about the atmosphere.

Brunch a Go Go!

(Updated! New pics below!)

I like to think of Brunch (note the capital "B") as the official pastime of NYC, specifically of the Upper West Side, but hey let's not be single minded here. Brunch can make or break your weekend. It can provide heady water cooler fodder for equally discriminating foodies come Monday morning. And let's face it, it's delicious.

New York is filled with dozens of worthy Brunch spots. Often you will see groups of gal pals sipping mimosas, or a young person discreetly nursing a hangover while entertaining those pesky parents who thought nothing of arriving for a visit at 11 a.m. on a Sunday morning. But Brunch provides a wonderful, and slightly different, date option for those willing to see their sweetie in the broad daylight. Plus you can drink during the day!*

*On Sundays, libations are withheld until after 12 noon, but Saturdays are a free-for-all. Bring on the early morning booze.

So let's get the ball rolling. Here are a few of my favorite Brunch spots, and the reasons why you should make them your own.

The Scenester Brunch
Jane ~ 100 W. Houston, b/w Thompson & W. Bway
Four words: Vanilla bean french toast. I admit, I'm partial to FT, and I've made it my part time job to find the richest, most decadent in the city. Jane wins. They have a very similar menu to the former glorious Neptune Room of uptown fame. Every brunch order comes with your choice of several delicious complimentary cocktails, such as the "White Peach Bellini" or "Raspberry Champagne Cocktail." Plus the scene is pretty bustling and hip, with music a bit trendier and louder than your average bruncher may be used to playing throughout the restaurant (though this is SoHo we're talking about here). You might have to pay close attention to your date, or learn to read lips. All the more reason to lean in close. Be prepared to wait, like most decent brunch spots. But this one is worth it. Your date- may I suggest 2nd date?- will appreciate your selection.

The Spirited Brunch
Calle Ocho ~ 446 Columbus, b/w 80th & 81st
One would never suspect from walking through the colorful, glossy bar area & entry way, that Calle Ocho is home to a cavernous main dining room. This choice is great for groups, but not off-limits to couples by any means. Steer your date over to the free unlimited sangria bar to break the ice, even before you order your meal. Savor some of the warm breads delivered to the table and enjoy the vibe. The food is tasty and flavorful, though the portions a bit small, perhaps to make up for the aforementioned free & flowing bevvies.

The Brunch On The Go
Grab some egg (whites!) & cheese bagel sandwiches from 72nd Street Bagel, scones from Alice's Tea Cup, or some rich hot chocolate from Jacques Torres*, and stroll over to the park surrounding the American Museum of Natural History to enjoy each other's company al fresco and people watch. Perhaps, if you're lucky, there will be a street fair to savor as well.

*J.T. hot choc works just as well at their Dumbo location where you can enjoy the great view from the newly renovated Brooklyn Bridge/ Empire-Fulton Ferry State Park nearby.

Worth The Wait? You Decide...
This wouldn't be a fully satisfying brunch post without paying homage to those NYC landmarks that draw brunchgoers literally lining down the block. All delicious. But hey, it's your date. You could always bring a laptop and watch a dvd together, or play 20 questions while in line.
SaraBeth's West, East, South (Who knew there were so many SaraBeth's?)
Clinton Street Baking Company- Pancake Month is legendary here.
Good Enough To Eat- I finally had the patience to wait in line- and the good fortune for it to be a relatively short wait- for that pumpkin french toast (the only one to my knowledge in NYC). Not bad.
Cafe Lalo- Tiny or cozy? Loud or exciting? Your call... remember to point out to your date that You've Got Mail was filmed here!

Honorable Mention

I could go on and on about brunch, but here are some other worthwhile locales that you and your date will enjoy.

Community Food & Juice- Uptown organic food decadence; their omelets are legendary, and the hot buttered cider is positively sinful- next time I'll try it with the rum.

Whym- Tasty Hell's Kitchen meal
Elmo- Vibrant & buzzing Chelsea scene

What's been YOUR favorite brunch date?

Hungry For Love NYC

Have you ever wondered about the perfect place to enjoy a cozy brunch in New York? How about a decadent dessert? Where to find the most enticing cocktail list? Of course you have, you're a New Yorker, and you love to wine & dine.

Now, think about the other biggest topic on the minds of most city dwellers: Dating! Just how do you meet and keep that special someone with whom you can enjoy all the gourmet treats NYC has to offer?

You've found just the place to get dining & dating advice! We are a new site that offers specialized recommendations for just what you're looking for, whether it's that first date you really want to impress, a fun & easy going afternoon, or a special occasion evening. And while we're at it, we'll help you figure out the best approaches to NYC dating.

Hungry For Love NYC. Serving the tastiest dish in town.